It’s Time for Play: Know Thyself, Give Yourself Permission to Have Fun, and Protect the Fun

This is Mornings with Matt, the Dearing Acting Studio Podcast, where we discuss the connection between life and acting. Oh my goodness. Priceless. We're vibing in here this morning. I don't know what Matt is doing, but it's pretty entertaining. It's playtime, Joey. Woo! It's playtime. That's what he's doing. Dang, dog. I picked up on it. I was like, I know what you're doing. I thought you were just being silly.

I was. That's dope. Which is playtime. Yeah, it's playtime. Brian was playing right along with me. Oh yeah. Yeah, I just missed the cue. I'm cool with that. It's playtime, people. Playtime. Playtime. Time for play. So, uh, we're going to get down today talking about playtime. Very important. Before we do that, of course, let's, uh, let's hit up our cheat sheet, Brian. All right. Let's hit that daily devotional to the Lord.

All right. We've got three verses today. Um, two of them we're just going to connect sort of right together. Uh, and we'll talk about the why behind that. Uh, so let's start off. We've got Ecclesiastes 2, 24. There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil. This also I saw is from the hand of God. And then the one that we're going to connect to that, you want me to do both same, like, or do you want to stop first?

I mean, what you feeling? What you feeling, playtime? What am I feeling, playtime? I'm feeling like, let's stop and talk. Let's define the word toil really quick. Cause I, I actually, I think I know what it means, but I don't know. I know what it means. I'm pretty sure I'm in the same boat as you there. Cool. Joey, you've got the computer. Can you, is it possible for you to look up the word toil?

Yeah, I sure can. I feel like it's work. It's toil, like work or, or. Work extremely hard or incessantly exhausting or physical labor. Wow. That was impressive. I just thought it was something bad. Like Joey said, when he said devil, devil, toil and trouble, it sounded like, I just know it from the witchy. I was like, I thought I knew, but I wasn't sure that I knew, you know, it's like, and for the context of it.

So, so interesting though, right? Cause, um, it's saying that, um, nothing is better for a person. Nothing's better for you. So like, what's good for you, Brian? Not even blueberries, says the Lord. It should. Um, so interesting because, because truthfully, I wasn't even going here today. And it just happened. So we'll connect into this and then we'll get to the other thing. I mean, maybe it does connect perfectly.

I don't know. It usually does. Good job, God. Um, so. Cheat, cheat. To eat and drink and find enjoyment in your toil. In your work. Find enjoyment in your work. There's nothing better for a person than to find enjoyment in your work. Mm-hmm. Wow. I never saw the toil part. Wham, wham. In your bad stuff was what I saw. How many times have we, find enjoyment in your bad stuff.

Yeah, like. If you do bad things, find enjoyment in those things. Yours makes so much more sense. Yeah. Yeah. No wonder you've been screwed up your whole life. I know, right? I do bad all the time. I just want to find, I just want to have fun while I'm doing it. Come on. Guess what God said to do. That was what God said in Ecclesiastes 2.24. No, I mean, how many times have we said that?

You know, I mean, people get stuck in doing things, jobs, whatever, that they don't love. Or, truthfully, they just, a lot of times we choose not to find enjoyment in what we're doing. Love that. That is a choice. Yeah, totally. Yeah, that's, that's, I referenced the conversation I had with Ben Gabriel when he came in this week. BG. And, um, but this was a part I didn't get to, and he literally said that exact thing.

He was like, his, his dream is a world where everybody goes and pursues something that they love. Because he, he said, he was like, then it doesn't matter how much you work because it's not work. It's something like you're passionate about. He's right. There's nothing better for a person. Yeah. Nothing, not even blueberries. Not even blueberries. Especially not blueberries. Especially not blueberries. All right, let's hit, let's hit, let's move on to some Corinthians.

All right. First Corinthians 10, 31. Is this the one about Zacchaeus? No, not about Zacchaeus. Zacchaeus is not in today's story. Brian kept saying Zachariah, and I just go to Zacchaeus. And he started singing the Zacchaeus song. Yeah, it's a great song. Maybe we'll sing it at some point. We'll see. Well, and the reason we're bringing this one up is because we, we're talking about eating, drinking, playing.

We're talking about those things. So, so it's, it's really good to put things into context. Yes. Yes. And I believe that Corinthians is going to do this for us. This is context for the drinking and the partying. The blueberries. This puts the blueberries into perspective, I would say. Go ahead. I agree. First Corinthians 10, 31. So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.

So even when you're playing, whatever you're doing, you're giving God glory with how you do it. I think it's sort of what I take out of that. And even this small. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Say that again. Say it again. Say what you just said. That basically, I don't remember how I said it, but that when we do something, whatever it is, whether we're hanging out or having fun or whatever, we do it for God's glory.

I need to learn how to use the replay button. Yeah. Because, you know, you asked Brian to repeat things all the time and he says it so elegantly the first time and then the next time he gets in his head. It's so hard to get back to it. So, well, no, the reason I was having him repeat it is I think one of the words you're saying is potentially, like it's right, but at the same time I want to be careful about it.

Because you're saying whatever I do, I'm going to do it and I'm going to give glory to God for that thing. And there's another way to look at it too, which would be make sure what you're doing is glorifying God. Sure. Yeah, absolutely. Right? So it could be like, hey, you know, we're getting drunk, but I'm glorifying God, you know, and I'm choosing it. Right? But if you are honest with yourself, you can tell if your choice is something that's glorifying God or not.

Yeah, absolutely. Right? So it's like in all that you do, yes, drink. Yes, eat. Yes, have fun. And truthfully, like we've talked about this even with your diet. I mean, I keep going back to you right now, but, you know, you're kind of the hot topic now that you're back on the show. Yeah, yeah. I mean, just all around the studio, really. Of course, yeah. And therefore, for us, it was a dangerous thing that we just didn't want to get into.

Yep. Dang. You literally like stole that out of my mouth through like mind brain tricks. That was dope. It was sitting there in your braces and I just yanked it. Oh, that's dope. I saw it and I was like, I'm taking that. Yeah. I think I'm like… I'm like a toothpick. Yeah, yeah. I'm like a toothpick of knowledge. I think my wisdom tooth is coming in on the left side, which is why, like, my throat is, like, iffy.

Oh, and it's why you're getting smarter, too. Well, it hurts really bad. Well, it hurts to get… It hurts to grow, Joey, which is a topic coming up, by the way. Yeah. Hurts to grow. But, yeah, you're becoming wiser. There you go. Now that you've got a wisdom tooth coming in. I think so. Come on, Brian. Keep up. Oh, good stuff. All right. We have one more Bible verse.

We decided to go… We're doing a three-fer today. Three-fer today. Three-fer. All right. This is another from Ecclesiastes. It's Ecclesiastes 3, 4. A time to weep and a time to laugh. A time to mourn and a time to dance. Hmm. Beautiful. Is it the Beatles that sang that song? I'm pretty sure they stole it. Yeah. Is it the Beatles? I'm like… Is that the band? A time for…

I mean, it sounds like they did the same thing that we've been doing, which is, you know, they understood that, hey, the Bible's a cheat sheet. Oh, dude. So many songs, movies, all this stuff. Now that I read the Bible every day, I'm like, Game of Thrones stole that. I've seen this before. And you guys didn't invent it. That's crazy. You just put a spit on it.

Yeah. So, but I'm asking, maybe the audience will make fun of me if it's not the Beatles. But the song is like… A time for… I'm pretty sure. You know what I'm talking about, Joey? Have you heard that song? I actually don't. What? I don't… I know the Beatles, but I don't know, like, all of their songs very well. So, basically, the song is like, it was during wartime.

And it's like, there's a time for war. There's a time for peace. There's a time for love. There's a time for hate. Like, there's a time. And honestly, when I read this in the Bible, I was like, you guys, if it was the Beatles, whoever it was, jacked this idea right from the Bible. So, good for you. So, there's a time for love. There's a time for war.

There's a time for peace. There's a time for… There's a time for war. Time for peace. Time for hate. Time for love. So, it's like opposites. Yeah, but it's like… It's got you. It's like, be honest with yourself and allow yourself to change and move into the new thing. You know? That makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. Is there a time for a Brian Sweeney shameless plug? Yes. There is.

What? I just figured out who it was. Come on. Come on, Brian. Shamelessly plug the band. Ladies and gentlemen, I like to shamelessly plug The Birds. Is it The Birds? The Birds. Are you sure? We do a song called Turn, Turn, Turn. A time to be born. A time to die. A time to plant. A time to reap. A time to kill. A time to heal. A time to laugh.

A time to weep. That's The Birds? Yeah. It's The Birds. The whole time I thought it was The Beatles. Did anyone in the comments get that right? Anybody? Hey, The Birds! Because they're behind. Astrid said, it's The Birds, but they sound like The Beatles a little. Oh, well. They do. And you know, if you're looking to read a book from the guy who got it wrong on this, it's my day job, seven strategies to market and make money as an actor.

I do not give advice on song titles. There's not. There's not in the book. That's a promise. That's not what it's about. I promise to you. Also, what's coming up on Saturday, Brian? We've got a show on Saturday, Joey. Yes! By the way, I wasn't supposed to be there. Or I was supposed to be there. Then I thought I wasn't going to be able to be there.

And now it looks like I'm going to be able to be there. You are going to be there. And then I said I felt awful because I put up after he told me the promo. And when I put out the promo, I said the bro duo. So now I guess I just won't come, even though I could come. But it's easy to fix. We can just alter it in the editing.

Yeah. The bro trio. Yeah. Well, no, it could still be the bro duo with you guys. The two of you happen to be superheroes in the show. Ah, okay. So I don't think that promo needs to go away. I mean, whatever works. You know what I'm saying? Point is, come to the show on Saturday or watch the link online. The online link, Joe, how do we get a hold of that?

That'll be on YouTube, but the ticket link is right in the description of this here live video. What? You can just scroll down and see it and bam, get your ticket link? Wow. Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't. I would do it right now, but if you want to wait until commercials when the Chaos promo shows up, that's cool. You can do it then. Yeah. Commercials is a great time.

We got a new Chaos promo. Oh, you know it. You know it. The slideshow. Joey, that's solid, bro. Yeah. Boom. Boom. New commercials. All right. So here's our opening monologue here. I'm going to start. I'm going to do this quickly and then we'll go to our first break. So honestly, we're about to get serious about play time. Okay. Because it is a serious topic. There's a time for play.

And if you don't take the time for play, your life can feel very incomplete. And I've seen this many times with especially highly successful people who grind. And I've seen it in myself sometimes. You grind, you grind. You watch them work and work and work for what they think they want. And then they're feeling unfulfilled even as they succeed, quote unquote, or they achieve certain goals that they thought that they wanted.

And then you get to that place and you're unfulfilled. So we're going to talk about the idea, the importance of play. So we're getting very serious about that. And making sure that we're not overworking ourselves. Making sure that there's a balance in your life. And we don't want to strive for exact balance. We want to talk about this concept called counterbalance. So in our three segments today, we're going to start with know thyself so you can treat yourself.

That's the first segment. Second segment is going to be about giving yourself permission to love. And we're going to end up with our big takeaway, which is going to be how to protect yourself so that you make sure that your fun time is actually fun time. So we'll be back after these messages. Yo, we are back. Play time. Play time. Play time, play time. Yo, I'm Joey Sweeney and the place to be is Dearing in the studio.

God, I know you so you treat you right. All right, cool, I guess. I was just jumping on your beat with the actual section. Yeah, but what was the verse? Couldn't be farther away from a rhyme. You got to know what so you treat you right. That's not even a real sentence, eh? You got to know you so you treat you right. All right. You got to know you so you can treat you.

Yeah. Right? Know thyself. Who said know thyself? Don't cheat. You're cheating. I'm cheating. I'm cheating. I don't know. I was looking at what you're saying. Socrates. Yes, it was Socrates. It says so right here. Socrates. Socrates. Socrates. Socrates. Socrates. Socrates did. Know thyself. Mmm. Important. Why do we got to know us, guys? Because no two people are alike. Okay. How does that relate to play time? Well, if I try to do something that makes you happy that I see you doing, it may look really nice, but it's not actually bringing me joy.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You may love the boats, you may love the water, and I may be scared of the water. For real. Because water can kill, Brian. Yeah, well, right now, you're right. The water. This can be terrifying. Yeah, so you want to, we got to let go of what other people think. Let go of that comparison is what you're saying, right? So I see somebody else being happy.

I see somebody else doing something that then they're like, this is great, this is, you know, and you're going, oh, if I only had that, I'd be happy. No, like, what makes you happy? Don't, don't lie to yourself like you've never been happy in your whole life. Of course you have. You're just not focusing on that thing. Or maybe, maybe you don't even realize what it is that truly brings you happiness.

And that's why we got to stop to know thyself. Mm-hmm. What makes you happy, Brian? Spend time with you guys. Facts. Big question there, buddy. Facts. Yeah. Spend time with us. Interesting. That wasn't that big of a question. He had an answer right away. That one, that one's so simple for me. It's still a big question whether or not he's got the right answer, which is awesome.

Yeah. But oftentimes you get asked these big questions you don't know. You, you got asked, it was, I'm telling you, Joey, this is a big question there, buddy. Because, because to know what makes you happy, it's interesting. And then you're like hanging out with you guys, which is what we're doing right now. Yeah, absolutely. But technically it's toil. In trouble. Technically. Technically it's toil. Yeah. So you found enjoyment in the toil.

Now, did you always find enjoyment in the morning show, Brian? No, I did not always find enjoyment in the morning show. Nor did I see the power of it. Nor did you even realize, and I'll say same for me, I'm just saying you right now. Nor did you even realize that you were hanging out with us, which is what makes you happy. Right. What? What? 100%. What makes you happy, Joey?

What makes you happy? Can't use Brian's. Ooh, okay, cool. I mean, I got plenty. I love producing. I love producing. I love performing. And so that's why, you know, I will, I will use the same example of this show because, you know, you say it's toil. It is, you know, trying to, trying to get everything organized beforehand. That's, that's a lot of work. Um, it becomes easier because it's a daily process and gets faster every day.

However, it's always a time, time crunch there. And it's kind of fun because I like the competitiveness of it. But then to, uh, come into the show, have a great show, have fun with you guys and see the effect of all of the work we put in beforehand that makes it not toil. Yeah. Yeah. I love how we're just using the word toil as many times as possible.

Toil, toil. That's how you remember a word too, right? It's like, if you learn it, then you try to figure out what it means and then try to use it in a sentence often. Very often. Then all of a sudden looking up words no longer feels like toil. It doesn't feel like toil. All right. So I was sitting outside yesterday. Uh, I, I was walking back from your place.

I went to wake you up. You were having a siesta. It was a beautiful siesta. And, uh, you woke up with lots of energy, which was great. And I'm walking back and I see Joey's dad sitting there. And so I walk up and, and just, just my dad, just, just my dad. Right. Well, yeah, it was Brian's dad too, but I, I, I, I guess your dad.

I see the two of your dad's dad. I just thought that was funny. Yeah. Uh, Brian does have a, no, I'm just kidding. Oh. Really? So. If there's a mailman's child, it's Jimmy. Yeah. We cannot. We've done with him. True. True. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was born from a dark, a little word. Okay. So, so I walk up, I see your guys' dad or AKA my uncle Brad and he's sitting there and he's all perched up.

And I, the first thing I said to him was like, you look like a proud squirrel who just found an acorn. Cause he was just like, like he was just up and just enjoying life. He's sitting there and just looking out at a parking lot. And here's what's interesting. I sit down and he had some things to say and he was, he was talking about life and things were down a little bit for, for him in, in his mind mentally for just two seconds.

And then I, and then I just kind of flipped the script on him. I listened, I listened, I listened, I listened, but I didn't do what I normally do and like go into it. Instead, I just, I just sort of changed topics and I was like, uncle Brad, isn't life just crazy? And he kind of looked at me with this big smile on his face and I'm like, that's your son out there who like loves football and he's playing with an NFL recruit, just playing catch.

And this is a day, by the way, this is a day in the life of us. This is what we do. We are working right now. I didn't say toiling. I could have. I could have. Yeah. But like, we're, this is our work day. We're at work. And he's like, if you would have just seen my work day today. And I'm like, yeah, this is our work day.

It really is our work day. Yeah. And just the idea, the thought that Joey, who loves football, connected to football and has found now multiple friends who are going into the NFL to just hang out with on a regular basis, right? Through what? Through this place. Through this work. Through being dedicated and constant and staying true, right? It didn't come from him giving up and changing course and thinking like, oh, football makes me happy.

So I'm going to go, like, no, it came to, it came to him through doing good. It's, it's interesting concept. Yeah. And then I look at this too. And, and, and I'm going to bring me to my next quote here, which is, there's no fear when you're having fun. A guy named Will Thomas said this, there's no fear when you're having fun. And I thought what a perfect example this is.

Okay. Because should you be fearful running full speed through a parking lot where cars drive and not looking where you're going? A little bit. Yeah. You should, you, any other time there would be fear. You'd be worried about the cars, right? Yeah. Right. If you're running and then you're in a parking lot and you're looking away, you would be scared. Mm-hmm. But Joey's having fun catching a football and there's no fear where there's fun.

I was like, wow. Yeah. What a great connection there. Dang. That's dang. The amount of times I've run full speed in the parking lot to catch a football and like tripped on myself. No, I've seen him go towards like a pole and like a sidewall, like no stopping. And I'm like, you're not even like slowing down. But apply that to everything. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Apply it to everything.

So as you overcome the fears in your life, things become fun. Yeah. So this, maybe the show, was a drag sometimes. It was work. It was hard. We didn't want to do it. Truthfully. Yeah. It was hard to get up. It was hard to be committed. It was hard for whatever reason, it was hard. Until we got good at it, we lost the fear, personally, all of us.

We got better at doing the thing. And so from being competent and confident and having fun, the fear of it goes away. Yeah. I mean, I've said this before, but I was legitimately terrified of going live. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I would get all nervous. I forget we're live half the time now. But I would get super nervous. As a matter of fact, I hated it when you would, because Brian's always on to the new thing.

And I'm always a little bit hesitant, which is why we make such a good couple. Brian's my other wife. I've got Leeann and I've got one. All right. I've got to freaking do it. Yesterday, there was a package that came in, and Matt and I were like, we didn't order anything. And we opened it, and it's like this shower head. And I was like- Beautiful shower head.

Thank you. He was like, is this yours? And I was like, no. It says Dearing Acting Studio on it. I was like, did Leeann order it? And he was like, I don't think so. But she might have. Could have been her. And then he goes, yeah, it had to be one of my two wives, either Brian or Leeann. It's so funny. I was like, either way, I paid for it, probably.

Nah, I paid for it. Did you? Okay. All right. So anyway, this idea of you lose the fear in what you're doing, and then it becomes fun. There is no fear in fun. So whatever you're afraid of gets so good at it that you lose the fear of it. And then whatever you used to be afraid of will become fun. Look at public speaking. Same idea. Yeah.

You know? And let's be honest. It's not fun, even for us who are, you know, competent in that area, to be a public speaker when we're not prepared. Yeah, totally. It's not fun when there's fear involved. Yeah. Facts, yo. Facts. Nick said a really hurtful comment. He said, well, at least you'd be happy when you got run over. That's true. Yeah. You know what? That's facts, actually.

That's facts. Yeah. That's not even mean. If he meant to be mean, he failed. Yeah. I don't think he did mean to be mean. Think about this. Yo, but real. But for real. Like, life is dangerous. You can't protect. Like, people try to protect themselves. They try to protect their kids. Seabird! And Raymond Epps. Yeah. And Raymond Epps. Seabird's on his way to film with Netflix this week.

See? He left today. See? Yeah. Same idea. Running routes. The dude's grinding. You know what he's most bummed about? What? Missing the show. That's right. So funny. He's like, I gotta go do this Netflix thing, but I'm so upset about it. Yeah. No, he actually, he told me, he was like, I don't know if I should do it because of the show and because of the show cast last week.

I love that attitude. I love it. He was like, what do you think? And I was like, go freaking film for Netflix running routes. Like, you already run routes every day to practice anyway. You may as well get paid for and be on Netflix. Like, class is going to be here next week when you come back. Like, you're chilling. Yeah. So, so, so we'll end the segment here, but it's, it's, it's know thyself so that you can treat yourself.

Okay. Know what makes you happy and then be honest about what makes you happy. Okay. We're going to talk about that coming up next in giving yourself permission to have fun. And that could be tough. And we're back. It is time to give yourself permission to have fun. Want to talk about that right now. So, uh, this is a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson. He says, a child reminds us that playtime is an essential part of our daily routine.

And this is a different Waldo, Joey. That's not, not where's Waldo. Not that guy. This is Ralph Waldo. Oh, so we know where Ralph is. Ralph's not lost in a sea of people. Well, let's get back to the quote here that a child reminds us that playtime is an essential part of our daily routine. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. What do we need to get from that?

I think it's, I think it's that, you know, we're going back to, uh, the previous section, which was know thyself. Don't forget you were a kid once the child in you doesn't ever die. If we're honest, those of us who are, who, who, who are going to be a kid. Who continue to get older, God willing. I feel like you, you never feel old. I remember hearing my grandmother say that she's in her, she was in her eighties and saying, um, and yes, my grandmother, because it's on my mom's side, she, she, she would say like, I, I still feel like I'm 16.

Hmm. Hmm. Like in my mind, I'm still that age. See, I got a different interpretation of this. A different interpretation. Interpretation. I got a interpretation. It's a interpretation. Interpretation, y'all. Time now for Joey Sweeney's interpretation. Give us a interpretation, Joey. All right, so the interpretation of the day is, you know, we can learn from kids just as much as we teach them. So, you know, I know you've told us plenty of stories with your family, Matt, where you learn from your kids 24-7, but that's also something that you've stressed and Brian's stressed with youth classes and teens classes.

It's like, yes, we're here to teach them. However, they can teach us a lot too. 100%. And Brian got this recently, we talked about it a few episodes ago, Yeah. And how much that filled your spirit. 100%. It was just, like, so amazing because, like, they would get so excited that their energy, and they have so much energy. Right. Kids have so much energy. And they send it to you, and you can just feel it.

It's pure joy. It's unfiltered, right? And I think there's just, there's so much beauty in that. We talk about it in classes. Like, with the kids, you've got to get them to, like, bring it down a little bit and, like, and find different ways to go out of the imagination into some of the reality. And with the adults, it's the opposite, right? Yeah. Like, they come into class, and it's like, I got to get you to use that imagination.

So, I've got a really interesting story. Just, I think it was yesterday, a dad called up to, he just needed to make an adjustment on his account. And he happened to, like, peek into the classroom, and he saw that his daughter was sort of, like, hanging on the chair a little bit and not 100% paying attention. And he's like, I just want you to know that I told her, I let her know that, like, that's inappropriate, you know, and she really needs to, you know, pay attention.

And he's like, and I'm not sure if she does it all the time, but, you know, if she does, I'm sorry. And I was like, I was like, cool, thank you for saying that. I sure appreciate that. But specifically with your daughter and with two other kids in this particular youth class, and it's not all classes, but this particular one at this particular time has three kids who are what I would call ultra shy, and your daughter's one of them, and, and, and, or she was one of them two months ago.

And, and, and, and yesterday she was jumping off of the staircase in the theater, and she was doing cartwheels in class in front of everybody, and she was having fun while performing. And so I, I wanted to, I, just so you know, I was aware of it, I did get it in line, I did make sure that she was understanding and sitting, and I did have to correct her a few times.

However, with her and the other two, because of my goals for them as human beings, I needed to not reprimand the fun. Because she was, she used to be so shy in the room that she literally couldn't even speak in front of everybody. And I said, and your daughter yesterday spoke with such a big, loud voice, it would, it would blow your mind. So therefore, we don't want to kill the playtime, right?

We have to give ourselves permission to have fun. And that's what she was doing. She was giving herself permission to be herself in front of everybody. And I didn't want to be the one to take that away from her. Yes, she has to be critiqued in a certain way. Like you said, we got to bring that back a little bit, but we don't want to kill it either.

You can't kill the kid. If you kill the, like the, the childishness, right? Then you kill the fun. Yeah. And they're not having fun in class anymore. Right. Totally. Totally. And, and let's, let's go back to the, the, my kids, you calling them, right? Remember not to take it for granted. Right. Because here you're, you are out, you're feeling better. Mm-hmm. We're, we're back to classes, et cetera.

Now all of a sudden life can get in the way. Totally. And it's like, wait a minute, I have more time than I used to, or, or like, I'm feeling happy. Why am I not still connecting in that way at that same time? Literally my first thought when you said it. Yeah. I was like, I was like, oh man, I've kind of failed at that now that I've been out.

Or now I, now I could do it in person. I don't even have to do it over the phone. Right. Yeah. Just making time, you know, we did over the weekend, but then it's like, again, when you get into your week, that's when, uh, and I think this, we're all guilty of doing this, that you've got to remember to find those times. Right. You know, so it's, it's not necessarily going to look the exact way it looked.

And that's been my mistake with the past, even like calling grandma and stuff. Like I've had this plan for it. And when there wasn't classes on a week, it was easy to call it at the exact time that like fit that was like right at like nine when they finished. Um, but that's, doesn't necessarily work when there's a class going on. So you got to still like rearrange and make it happen.

Cause it's so important. Um, and I've had times where like literally when I'm doing it right, where someone will come and I'm, I'm acting a certain way. And someone's like, what are you like seven to me? And I, and I'll be like, yep, you know, like jokingly, but there's a spirit that comes from that and it's fun. Right. And, and then there's, okay. So then we're going to take this same thing.

And there was, there was something that we all know and love called the Sweener dance, which was, which was you as a child doing the most awkward out of beat dance ever, but doing it completely unaware and having a lot of fun doing it. And, and the, the, the long story short here is that an entire huge crowd at a, at an amusement park started dancing and following Brian's dance.

He was, he was a kid and everyone's doing the out of beat dance because it became cool. Yeah. Because you were having fun doing it. Yeah. Okay. This is a, this is a new, new thing on the agenda, but we need to make a music video for the Sweener band. Oh, for sure. Okay. All right. All right. So, so that being said, when you're having fun, whatever's fun for you, you got to be careful not to judge yourself.

Mm-hmm. Okay. However, at the same time, make sure you get to the core of that thing. So, so that this goes into, so I'm going to give my, myself permission, but I also want to make sure I get to the core of it because life comes up, things change, whatever. And if I've put all my stake into thinking, this is like this particular activity or this particular thing, doing it this particular way is what makes me happy.

As soon as that gets adjusted, it can really throw you. It's like, it's like for me, like knowing that I find joy and I find success in waking up early and being here early and getting to get a headstart. As you know, today I didn't. Mm-hmm. I had to fight my own mental battle to, to, to help myself understand it's okay. Like it's not going to be perfect every day.

That's not what it's all about. Right. Yeah. So, so knowing like, okay, Joey loves, you know, catching the football. We talked about that, right? Well, so do I. Mm-hmm. Okay. I haven't been able to play basketball. I haven't been able to do a lot of the things that made me happy. So you got to get to the core of what was it actually that was making you happy because there's, there's, there's other ways of achieving that thing.

And, and obviously we have to figure that out as we age and change, we have to find like, what is the actual core of that thing? So that, so that we can make sure that we stay happy. Why are you smirking, Joey? Um, we got a comment. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of them. Um, so I, I, it must've been in this last speech you gave, but, uh, Nick or Dakota put dot, dot, dot.

I didn't get it. And then a ton of comments showed up and Nick said, did you say steak? And then Dakota said, did Matt just say steak? And then Nick said, yes, Dakota. And he said, yes, Nick. And then he said, my boy. And now they're both laughing. Did I say steak? Yeah, I know. I don't remember you saying steak. I couldn't remember you saying steak. Maybe it was put steak in something.

I might've said steak in something. Yeah. I did say steak. That's funny. Um, yeah. So, so then, and, and, and I, I go back to this, like giving yourself permission thing. Right. And I think that that's a willingness also to allow yourself to be loved for you to love you and allow yourself to be loved by other people too, you know, cause at times you want to like cut that off.

And, and I, and I get, I go back to permission because why, why was it that for a time the two of you specifically didn't want to admit that this morning show was fun? Why? What was it in you that didn't want to do that? You know what I mean? You didn't want to give into it. My dad used to have this thing where we would like, my dad was like super hard worker.

I love my dad to death and, uh, or he is a super hard worker, but, but when I was growing up, he was, he was always gone, always working, always providing. That was his thing. So we, we'd gear up for these big, like extravagant vacations and he would always get sick and he would always bring work with him. And he would always like, he, he was, he had a hard time giving himself permission to have fun and just be in that space.

Right. And so, and I think there's a part of it. There's like this fear of saying like, yes, this is for me. I'm, I'm, I'm willing to say I'm, I'm being selfish because I'm giving myself self love right now. He wanted to hang into, hang on to being the victim. Right. And so there's this thing where like, if your work is fun and you admit that your work is fun, then, then like, are you allowed to have fun also outside of work?

You know, or whatever, like, are you allowed to leave or whatever? So if I, if I'm, if I'm admitting that the morning is fun for me, then can I complain about waking up anymore? I can't. So I better make sure that I call it work. You know what I mean? Like there's, there's something to that where I want to make sure that we understand this concept of really giving yourself permission that don't care about what other people think.

If that's fun for you, that's fun for you, you know? And, and I'll tell you what's, what's like right now would be not fun for me would be like sewing. Sounds awful. Yeah. It's hard. You have to like, look at the needle. I mean, it's going to be rough on your hands after a while. You know who it's really fun for? My son. He's really good. My wife taught him how to sew and he makes pillows and he loves it.

And, and then like, I watch him do it and, and he loves it. Well, like even going to like, we get a couch or something, like something you have to build, like some sort of shelf. You get like psyched about that. That's like my frigging nightmare. I do not like building things very much. Like I, but I admit it. Right. I admit, I'm like, weirdly, this is fun for me.

Yeah. I like, I enjoy doing this thing. It's something I've, I've learned to do. I've grown into, I enjoy it. And, and therefore I can say, Hey, I know I'm technically working, but right now I'm, I'm not having to use my mind space. I just get to use my physical self and kind of zone into something. And I really enjoy that thing. Yeah. But if you don't admit like, I like doing the social media, I like doing whatever, then you can feel like it's draining you and draining you and draining you.

And then it will. Yeah. Because of your, your perspective on the thing will either drain you or fill you. That's, what's crazy. Hmm. So this morning show will either fill us or drain us depending on how we look at it. Yep. Boom. Let's give ourselves permission to have fun guys. Let's do that audience. Let's give yourself permission to have fun. All right. So, uh, we're going to come back here with a quick takeaway, which is going to be, how do you protect your fun?

And this is a, I'm going to be talking directly to myself here in this next segment, how to protect your fun. It's going to be a great takeaway. We're going to end the show there. Yay. I don't know. Why not? All right. So, so this last segment here is going to be about, uh, this is something that I literally I just came up with this morning. So this is, this is for me and I'm hoping it helps a bunch of other people too.

So I always think to myself, you know what, if you struggle with this, maybe other people do too. And so the, the, the end takeaway here is going to be protect your fun with, with things that are, that are safe and, and that you enjoy that are, that are legitimately fun for you. Okay. So we, we talked about this a little bit ago. Fun is like, it's relative, right?

So my wife re I mean, I'm talking about sincerely enjoys cleaning. She really does. She, she would like a dream job for her would be to go to somebody's house. Who's like a hoarder and help them throw things away. It's I'm serious. It's a, that's a dream job for her. She studies, uh, Marie Kondo. She's always online watching newer and better ways to fold and to what, she loves cleaning.

She just does. Yeah. Okay. She doesn't love that. I leave my socks out. She's not like, Oh, I hope Matt makes a mess so I can clean after him. She just, but, but the process of doing it like, like building the shelf is fun. I don't want to build shelves all day, every day. Right. But like, but doing it, like when I give into it, I like it.

Okay. Um, there was a quote I didn't get to that I want to say really quick, which is, and I don't remember who said it, but it's that play gives children a chance to practice what they're learning. And if we remember that we are all children always until the day we die, there is a child inside of us. Remember that you got to play. So, so you practice, you practice, you practice, you practice so that you can play the game.

Then you go back to practice. So, so playing the play part of it is your chance of it to practice what you're learning. All right. Dakota said, uh, stuff is happening at work. Love y'all. See you later. I'm just wondering if maybe he placed the wrong label on some medicine or no, I'm just kidding. Stuff, stuff's happening at work, guys. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Good. Well, go have fun at work.

Yeah. Make the choice. Make the choice. Have fun in your toil. Yeah. Um, so, so here's what, here's what happened, uh, to me last night. And this is why I want to bring up this topic. So I go home and there, I remember I told you, I was like, maybe I'll just do this thing at home. I had a couple, I had a couple of things left that I really wanted to get done.

And specifically it was because, um, the, the, the people that we use as vendors to work on our website, uh, they've been very, very loyal to us. We've been loyal to them. We've been working together for probably a decade. So that's a long term relationship. Yeah. And so, uh, but, but they work on different hours than we do. So essentially they work while we sleep. So if you don't get into a good habit of giving them things to do before you go to bed, then by the time you get to it the next day, you have to wait an entire 36 hours for anything to happen.

Right. So I was very committed to getting this done before my work day was over. But the truth is yesterday I got up early, you know, and I worked hard and I worked consistently and I had a great day and I probably should have put it down. Hmm. Okay. I'm just going to tell myself that. So then I tried to take it home. Guess what? Dad, you, you know, you did the thing that you just complained about your dad doing.

You did. Okay. So I come home, my son comes up, gives me the greatest hug. We snuggle for a second. I do my affirmations and I say, Hey, I'm going to, I'm, I want to grab a bite to eat son. And then I'm going to do this one thing. And then, and he's like, and then can we snuggle dad and watch some star Wars? And I'm like, yes, we can.

And I sat there and as I'm getting the thing done and having a hard time doing it because my mind is not there. I'm going to turn Joey's eating down just a bit. I'm done. Are you done? Cause I'm, I'm, you're down. I'm, nobody can hear that you're done. Ah, um, uh, no, they can now. So, uh, so, so, so I, so I'm sitting there and he falls asleep.

Of course it's late. He should be asleep anyway, but, but I would have, I would have really liked to do that and I, and I didn't do it. I didn't protect my, I didn't protect that time. You know what I mean? So then what happens? You start, I start feeling guilty. Then it goes, and so then guilt leads to shame, which leads to, you know, fear, which leads to like negativity.

And then all of a sudden my night becomes negative instead of positive. Right. I wasn't able to bookend my day. I got weak. So my thought for myself, and this is what I want to share with everybody is I want to, I want to think, okay, what are the times that I tend to be weak? That I tend to be in a weak state. Yeah. Okay. When do I snack late at night?

You know, when, when, what are the times that I feel like, like I'm weak? All right, great. How do I protect myself and let me give myself a list of things that I could possibly do then that I love doing? Yeah. And then just pick one of those things and even pick a person, you know, I could call Brian, I could call Joey late at night. Um, I could, whatever, like I could go literally wake up my son and go, let's watch Star Wars.

I mean, whatever it is, I should have a list and go, these are things you love doing that are safe, that are good for you, that are fun. Then you don't fall into bad habits. Don't fall into negative thought patterns because all of a sudden you're in this weak state of mind and, and you, you know, and you violated one of your rules or something like that.

So then all of a sudden my son falls asleep. So now I'll, now I'm in this like, like guilt, pain spiral mentally and it's so not good for me. So then what happened? Of course, those things led to me not getting up early, which then what? Then you feel guilty again. Then I'm on edge a little bit, right? Where I'm, I'm creating this show a little bit last minute.

I'm, I'm a little bit more abrupt with you when you're asking about the Bible verse, right? Cause I, cause now I'm like stressed for time. Yeah. Um, I did the dishes. I almost, I almost ripped on you guys for the dishes. I actually pulled back on it because I was like, no, like, like, stop it. You know, stop it. What are you doing? Like I had to, I had to literally talk myself off of a ledge.

So then, so knowing that that is the way that it is, it's what I think is going to be interesting is creating this list for myself and even putting them in the place where I know I'm probably going to need it and go do this. This is something you can do right now. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I love that you also went to finding all of the positive things that fill you up.

So I think sometimes we look at, you look at the negatives and you go, these are the things that you want to go away from, right? If this happens, yikes, be careful. But we haven't thought about all the things that immediately when that happens, fill us up that like, and again, it will be different for everybody. It'd be completely different for everybody. Um, and what that looks like.

I mean, it might be for like Joey, it might be playing a video game for a minute. Like it, and that's okay if that's what it means and you're understanding it and going, this is what's going to fill me up in this way. Right. And you, I think it comes from acknowledgement, acknowledgement, acknowledgement, acknowledgement. Well, and, and, and again, like going into the connectedness of it, because you, you talked about this yesterday about TV and there being a difference between, cause this is what I did last night.

I ended up watching, you know, Vikings or something and then like, it wasn't great and my mind goes to like not good places and, and I knew I wouldn't, like, I just, I wanted to be asleep. I didn't want to be like staying up, you know, like I had, so, so it's fine. It's like, honestly, it's fine. But, but knowing the truth, like, is it, is it wrong to watch a TV show?

No, it's not wrong. Like, it's not wrong with that. Is it wrong to play a video game? No. No. But, but, but it's, it's wrong that maybe if you know your spirit's telling you not to watch Netflix all day, every day. Right. Difference between that and, and watching a movie with my kids on the couch, snuggling up to them as you did as an uncle, you know, watching something and having that fill both of your buckets, you know, and, and, and bring absolute joy into your life.

Those are two very different things. Yeah. Technically the same idea. Right. And, and Brian, you brought this into it, but, um, it's interesting because, uh, it also goes back to getting all the way to the root. Right. So, so you were like, for me, it might be video games. True. Um, sometimes I like to play a video game online with some random stranger, but very rarely. Actually, the way a video game fills me up is if I'm playing with somebody and spending quality time with them.

So whether that be our cousins, whether that be Matt, whether that be you, that's when I like to play video games cause I do enjoy them. But if I'm just mindlessly playing online with random people, it, it, it, it doesn't feel like, Well, not only that, but not only that, but it probably can empty you. Yeah. It can, it can get to a place where pain comes from it.

Guilt, the pain spiral, like I'm talking about. Yeah. It happens because you know, like you're trying to find something where it's not. Yeah. That's a great way to put it. And I'm, and I'm putting the happiness into the activity, but it's truthfully not the activity. And that's, that's why I'm saying it's, it's important to have that list, you know? And like, and, and who are your friends?

I think friends are people who you want to hang out with and who want to hang out with you. Yeah. You know, it's, it's, it's, it's silly what, what social media has done to us and been like, friend me. We're not friends. Yeah. Truthfully, you're not my friend. I'm not your friend. You know what I mean? Like, even though we, we click that button, that's not what that is necessarily.

And I, and I can, I can admit like my best friends are my family. Well, great. Yeah. You know, and, and I have, I have a few other friends too, but like, like real, real hardcore friends. I mean, they come from the studio. Usually they come from my family. They come from like this moment in time is like who my core friends are. And, and, and that's okay.

These are people I want to spend time with and who want to spend time with me. You know, and, and that's, and it's okay that that's my nine-year-old son. Yeah. You know, I don't have to feel bad or guilty that I don't have another person I'd rather spend time with. Yeah. That's just who I want to, that's who I want to be. So like, I don't, I don't need to feel insecure.

The fact that I, you know, I don't have a poker group or something like that. Right. Totally. Totally. So you mentioned with, with the protecting it, right. Would be the idea of creating that list. Is that right? Just the creating the list of times when you're weakest. Well, and I'm not, I'm not saying that this works because I'm, I'm just saying that this is something I'm going to, I'm going to try.

So I'm going to create a list. Yeah. I have one on week, but I'm also going to create a, then what could I do during those times? Where am I sometimes during those times? And then, and then if I can acknowledge it and jump into something that, that really fills me and can take up all my attention and if I make the choice to get into it, then whatever it is that's negative will go away because when you're having fun, there is no fear.

We talked about that earlier. Perfect. Right. So you can't have the fear. You can't have the negativity inside of fun. Yeah. They, they, they, they can't exist. Right. So, so for instance, if I had a list last night, I could have been like, Matt, you're feeling guilty. Checklist. Go outside, shoot basketball hoop. They got it. Yeah. Honestly, that sounds like fun right now. I would have had fun last night by myself in the dark, turn on the light, shooting a couple of hoops, I would have felt good and, and it would have been good for me and I, and I probably would have fallen asleep easier.

Right. I wouldn't have been beating myself up in that way. Um, a couple of quotes here before we end, this was a motivational quote. Uh, I liked this one a lot. I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time. That's good. This is why we have a hard time with this stuff. This is, I think this is why the guilt and shame stuff comes up because it feels like a waste of time.

If I'm halfway into fun and halfway into work and I haven't decided to have fun in my work or to just have fun in my fun, but if I'm straddling it, I feel like I didn't really have fun and I didn't really get that much work done. So then I feel guilty. I feel shameful. I feel like it was a waste of time and nothing hurts worse than feeling like you wasted time because that's the most valuable thing we have in this, in this world.

Uh, so that was a good quote. And then, and then, uh, this is so funny. Time flies when you're having fun. Obviously we've all heard that. It was Albert Einstein said that. It's crazy. Supposedly. I mean, that's what, that's what the, uh, internet, the internet told us. That's what the interweber net. Um, but imagine, you know, maybe the smartest guy on the planet to, to ever live says, says, uh, you know, time flies when you're having fun.

It makes sense. It makes sense. And how many times are you already like, Oh, I wish I could fall asleep. Like times, like go have fun. Yeah. Make the choice to have fun. And you talk about, he's one of the smartest people, right? We learned a lot from him. He kind of shaped what the world is. He probably had a lot of fun with what he did in work.

Yeah. Otherwise he wouldn't have been as successful as he was. He had a lot of thoughts. Yeah. I'll bet he had fun thinking. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Like that's kind of, kind of crazy when you put two and two together. Makes four. Oh. Am I right? Yeah. Boom. I mean, technically, yes. Albert Einstein. Yeah. Said that. He did now. I'll put it on the internet. He did now.

Make a blog about it. When you put two and two together, Joe, you get four. Albert Einstein. Albert Einstein. You guys can all take that with you. Thank you. That's cool. All right. Are we done or did you have a point before I broke you up? We are done. We're done. Okay. Thank you all for having fun with us this morning. We sure did have a lot of fun.

We have fun every morning and we sure appreciate you having fun with us watching this show. So thank you for being here. We're going to have fun tomorrow night. Yeah. In our chaos comedy show. Please do not forget to visit Lighthouse Theater. Is it LighthouseTheater.org? Dot org. LighthouseTheater.org. You can get yourself some tickets there. Share. Share this show. Help us spread this light-driven content to the planet.

God bless. Thanks for listening to Mornings with Matt. Please like, subscribe, and follow us at Dearing Acting Studio to keep up with the latest content. For more information on classes, private lessons, or professional development coaching, visit www.dearingstudio.com. Have a Dearing Day, everyone. Have a chippy day, everyone. Rough.